Sunday

This is my last day of my three day weekend. It has been so nice to have that extra day off.   This coming week I also work just three days and then have Thursday and Friday off in addition to the weekend.   Then my doc will be back Monday  and so will I.

He and his wife drove up to Maryland to visit his daughter, staying in motels, seeing some local sites, being tourists in DC. He is braver than I would be. He wears his mask, as we all do at work and in public,  but I'm definitely not ready to travel or try a motel or anything.  But he loves to travel and explore the USA when he can.

I am getting more nervous about my upcoming concert in July. I wrote to the concert promoters and the artists, asking them to reschedule for later in the year. I think July is just too soon: I know the venue is small, at only 625 people (which in normal times would be ideal). But now that feels like a big crowd, and there is no way we can do the 6-feet spacing.  I don't know what will happen. I don't want to ask for a refund, I want them to reschedule!  I don't know if my email will make any difference...but I have to try.  J says if I insist on going he will not only not go, but he will sleep in the guest room for 2 weeks afterwards. Jeez.

Anyway, in other news, he sat on and broke his glasses over the weekend, and so Monday he went to the place where he'd bought them. After some back and forth, it turns out the only place which could possibly repair them would be a jewelers shop with their tiny little tools,  and none of them are open. So he ended up with having a new exam and new glasses. So damn expensive--$258.   He is much happier with this new pair, and that's important.  He got two pairs for the price of one, but still.   (Next paycheck we'll get caught up again.) 

He also had an appt with the cardiologist to review the results of the Holter monitor and one medication in particular. So the upshot is he is now off the nasty medication, and the monitor results are just fine.  And in a funny frustrating coincidence: the coughing  and serious chronic lung congestion he's been dealing with for almost a year turn out to be a well-known side effect of that damn medication!!  

OMG. All this time he and I and his primary have thought this was allergies, and have been trying all kinds of decongestants and antihistamines, natural remedies, etc. Nothing has helped. And now we know why.

So naturally his chest x-ray had showed inflammation. And naturally his follow up CT was fine. And even by now, just a few days off the medication he is feeling so much better: the congestion has lessened. He's very relieved. We had just picked up a refill, so these will now be ground up into Fiona's kitty litter and tossed...

Wednesday the summer weather started here--by which I mean a dramatic increase in humidity and the afternoon or evening thunderstorms.  They are predicting an active hurricane season, which officially starts tomorrow. We are ready. J has boards ready if we need to cover the windows. The only problem is that I cannot help him with putting up the boards anymore due to my back injury last year; I can probably help hold the boards up, but if they start to slip, I have to drop them. I feel bad about that because there is no one else to help. He will have to ask a neighbor. Barry is gone, John is gone, James isn't speaking to him, that leaves Ken or Chris. 

Anyway the storms bring a lot of rain which is needed. On Friday, I did 2 hours worth of outdoor work in the yard and also working in the enclosure doing plant work--re-potting, trimming, moving things around. Filling bird feeders, trying to trim overgrown things. J was working out in the veggie garden and working on putting up a better irrigation and watering system.

Afterwards I had my pool time, and then I came inside and read. It was heaven. Later while J was napping I found some TV shows I'd started and never got to finish, so I got caught up on those. Then I prepared stuff for dinner, getting it simmering.  We watched the second Hobbit movie, as we'd watched the first one earlier in the week.

Saturday I had my AlAnon meeting; people were kind of subdued that morning.  I don't know if it's because of the news, the Covid19, the riots, the ongoing meeting online instead of meeting in person, the ongoing anxiety of not knowing what is going to happen--probably all of these. Sometimes it's just too much, just too overwhelming to watch the news.  I just have to not watch.  One of my friends is a therapist, and she reported that there was a definite increase in the number of patients who are suicidal, just in the past week.   It's all so stressful, and so exhausting.

And seeing the kind of response from the current occupant of the WH-- is just ... I have no words. He is no leader, and has no compassion, no sense of empathy, no idea or interest in how to try to unite or uplift the country.  I feel profoundly deeply saddened, angry, grieving.  But to allow myself to experience those emotions  fully? --I can't go there either. 

I need a sense of Hope. That's what music brings. And that's what some kinds of escapist TV bring, too. And being outside in the green.  And coloring. And seeing Family.

I think MissS is coming over later, which will be wonderful...

TYG

Sunday

Sunday again. J is finally at the flying field. He went back yesterday, and  is so happy.  He spent 2 hours there yesterday, and came back visibly more relaxed.  Enough so that he went again this morning after a hurried walk with the dogs.

Meanwhile yesterday, I had my AlAnon meeting, and felt a lot better too.Whatever is going on in my life, AlAnon makes it better.  The only stress --besides the obvious current political and virus stuff-- recently was the lightening storm the other night. It was a major event. It hit and downed a tree on a neighbor's house, bringing some wires down.  Then six electric trucks all converged that night on our street and hers. 

Between those engines rumbling, and the endless chainsaws for the rest of the night,  and my bout of serious leg cramps which attacked me that night, well let's just say I did not sleep well or much at all. I seriously thought about not going to work. I was so tired when I had to get up that I felt like crying. 

But I did go in, because there were only a few patients, and it was a Friday, a short day. I did ask to leave after my last pt was gone, and of course was allowed. My doc was quite concerned about my leg cramping, and asked more questions, made a few more suggestions. 

J picked me up at 1:30,  and at home I shed my scrubs and fell into bed, sleeping for only an hour before the dogs woke me. I had no energy left for the rest of the afternoon,  but that night I slept like a log. He'd already done all the errands  too that day, so we both were ready for the long weekend. He made Shepard's pie for dinner, one of  my favorite comfort foods.

I've been counting down the days until my haircut, because I was so anxious about going.   MissS met me there too,  and that helped so much. After all my anxiety, it turned out fine. She spent an insane amount of time on my actual haircut, stopping frequently to talk or examine or re-arrange. The whole thing took an hour. Which I was prepared for.

But the end result is amazing!  My hair is very fine, and curly/wavy.  She wants to encourage that, but get rid of the breakage first. So she took off about two inches, and reshaped it, and did the bangs. She basically told me to  stop using the products I am currently using, and to use two other specific ones instead, and to come back  in 6 weeks.  So I will. I bought the products (which will arrive tomorrow)--very expensive, but I'm looking at them as investments...

Then it was MissS' turn. Since her hair is so much longer and thicker her appt was about 90 minutes. Jeez. I'm so used to 15minutes, in and out. It's hard to get used to this longer process. But it was not as bad as I'd been dreading.  And seeing how relieved J was is worth it.  Fortunately he didn't ask me about whether she'd been wearing a mask. Or whether I was.

MissS came home with me afterwards and we binge-watched 3 episodes of Outlander, which we've restarted from the beginning.  Really loving it, again. She had dinner with us, which we ordered from a pizza place, although I had a chicken Caesar salad instead. So good. 

Earlier this week J picked up his Holter monitor. This time it was a small thing like pacemaker size. He wore it for 36 hours, and then took it off himself and mailed it in.  All done. 

Monday I got my second and final Hepatitis A vax, so I am all caught up on injections. And J is too.  We had our birthday potluck, cake, and presents for the doc on Tuesday. All food was yummy as usual. My gift of four small soy candles in pretty little re-usable gift tins was a big hit, thankfully. 

J had ordered a new chimney cap but when he went to put it on, it turned out to be two inches too small. This is not returnable since he painted it before realizing it wouldn't fit...so we have to order a second one, and put this one up for sale locally. Sigh. He feels so badly about it, but there's nothing we can do now, except hope we don't lose too much in the sale. (He had eye-balled the measurement, instead of climbing up on the roof and actually measuring. Safer that way, but clearly not accurate. )

My gym will open next week, but I won't be going back. The idea of having to wear a mask while doing my routine  on top of  not being sure about the cleanliness and the ability to do social distancing.. it's too much right now. 

And J refuses to even consider going back. So we had to dig up his membership information from the files and are now doing the official cancelling of his membership.  He has to take this to them in person this week. 

Not too much else going on. I was able to get in the pool after work every day this week--the temp is about 86, and Friday it was up to 88 degrees. So relaxing, and healing for me.

It's nice to have this relaxing Sunday. Later today we'll be heading to Sis' big house for our first family gathering in months. Potluck and grilling burgers, swimming, socializing and catching up. It will be wonderful to see everyone.  

I feel so blessed, so lucky, so fortunate. TYG. 

Sunday

So much happened this week: clearing up little things and big things off the mental List I carry all the time.

The screen repair guy came and did most of the repairs, but  due to a misunderstanding he did not do the bottom of the doors. And we also found two areas that still need repair, so J will have to buy a screen repair kit and do those himself. I'd give this job overall 80% approval, because we cannot reach the top part of the enclosure, and that's what  J wanted done mainly.  The rest is stuff he'll do.

The potluck was rescheduled for this week because the doc unexpectedly decided to take that day off. Her birthday is actually today, and she is off tomorrow too, so we'll do it Tuesday. Which means I wrap her gift today or tomorrow, and J will make the fruit salad I'm to bring on Tuesday morning. 

J's Holter monitor got rescheduled also, to tomorrow.

We took the leap after four exceedingly frustrating years of dealing with Florida's various insect visitors cockroaches, and hired a monthly pest control service.  That is huge, because J for years has said he didn't want to use chemicals...but that was before moving here and living with the nasty things! He has given in. Defeated by the bugs here at last.

So the bug guy , Dave, made his first visit Friday, placing his little unobtrusive baits all over, and circling the house all around the outside.  The difference just since then has been unbelievable.  They are almost completely gone.   For the amount of money we have spent on various baits and poisons and sprays and you-name-it  since moving here, we should have just done this first. What a relief.  Thank God we can afford it.

J's CT scan is just fine, absolutely normal. They never explained why it took so long to get back to him, nor did they apologize.

He is watering the garden faithfully, and babying those shrimp plant roots. We've moved the bird feeders a bit further from the old orange tree, so as to keep the squirrels from gobbling every bit of the seed before the birds can get it.

I weighed in for WW and have lost that pesky pound again. Just four more to go, to reach goal weight. I have a friend who is also doing this with me, and paid me the compliment of saying that "people like us" who don't have much to lose, when we get to those last five pounds, these are the hardest to lose.  That made me feel better. (Especially since I had splurged during the week and eaten not one, but two, ice cream sandwiches. I love ice cream sandwiches. They were made by Tillamook, a well-known cheese and dairy factory back in OR, and so I knew they would make great ice cream sandwiches. Sure enough, they were heavenly. Afterwards I looked them up on the WW app--14 points each. I'm allowed 23 points per day. Yeah, I blew it that day! )

Interestingly, I'm still able to lose despite not being able to go to the gym. That was a big worry of mine. When my gym was shut down, I was relieved  at first not to have to go. But after the first two weeks of freedom, that changed to a feeling of OMG, I actually miss the gym!  I really want to go back. What is going to happen to my fitness level without doing the walking and biking and strengthening exercises?   And now the feeling is: well, the gym  is back open, but do I feel safe?? I don't know.  I hesitate to bring it up to J, because he is just so paranoid about venturing out again. 

The haircut issue has been solved. I have a friend who has her own shop. I went there once with Sis when I first moved here. I like her, she's fun, but she is a talker.  I'm the type that likes to just get the hair cut and go. I'm not a girly-girl, I don't like gossip, I don't like my nails done, I don't like facials, or tons of makeup. 

However. She has her own shop, and generally it's just the client and her alone in the shop.  That is the big plus for safety reasons.  I got in touch with her, and I now have an appt for next Saturday. J is so, so happy that I am doing this. It's a big compromise: I'm going to  a safer place with someone I know, and that's strictly for J's sake. My usual place is a salon with 6 chairs, and lots of clients waiting in the chairs. I like it a lot, and have my two favorite stylists there. I'm comfortable there. Sigh. 

Well, times are different. Adapt, adjust, be flexible. 

I received something in the mail which needed to be returned. It was an inexpensive makeup buy, costing only $5. I normally wouldn't have bothered to return it, because makeup generally cannot be returned. But this website said they accepted returns, and there was a UPS label already included; all I had to do was pay for shipping. So J took it to the UPS place. I was at work, and he didn't know what was in the box...so he spent $11 to return this.  Argh.  We've since discussed this!! Never would I have spent that if I'd known it would have cost that much. 

Overall a good week. Work was mainly fine, except again at the last minute Friday we learned that temps and screening questions on people arriving in the building will be phased out. Now those will be done in each individual office. Also we will now have to wear masks anywhere--coming into the building, or just walking around in the building. 

But! If patients refuse to wear one, or if they refuse to have their temp taken, we cannot make them!   (What the hell??)  And as to whether we must see still them in the office if they refuse, I don't know. This email came Friday, late, and the docs will need to decide this. They haven't seen the email.

This reflects the general attitude in FL, sadly. This weekend we did a couple of errands and noticed a huge increase in traffic. We went to one place locally to pick up some hand sanitizer, which my brother had sent me a link for, to buy online.  No one there was wearing a mask. All very friendly, but jeez.  (That trip was a little adventure on its own. )

Then we went to Home Depot, and holy cow that place was mobbed. Parking lot was packed, and some people were wearing masks, some were  not. No one was monitoring the number of people in the store as they had been previously, but all employees were wearing masks. Social distancing? Ha.   

My AlAnon meeting was awesome as usual. Thank God for it. Seeing my friends' faces every Saturday morning is a relief, and  even if we can't hug, it's immensely comforting knowing we are all still out there in the world.   We've discussed whether and when we can all meet in person again but that depends on when the church re-opens. And then it depends on how comfortable people are in the small room we use. Comfortably we can seat about 25 people, but we sure can't do that if we are doing the social distancing. So then, do we meet outside? And if so, where? And it would need to be shaded...and air-conditioned, and a host of other considerations. 

So for now, it's the Zoom meeting. Which I am more and more comfortable with. Doing those at work too really helps: one day out of 12 patients on the schedule, 9 of them were Telehealth (Zoom).  The day went by very smoothly.

Right now J is refinishing the front door sconces outside.  He is taking them down, thoroughly cleaning after taking them apart, and replacing the bulb before putting them back up. One had a clutch of lizard eggs inside the fixings. Wow. Explains a lot. 

He is amazing.  I feel so blessed every day, despite his extreme anxiety about the pandemic. If that's the worst I have to live with, well then I'm incredibly lucky.  All the rest of the things that would have bothered me 40 years ago I can laugh at now. Thank god for perspective!

And TYG.




 

Sunday

What an ...interesting week.  

Monday morning at work there was an email which was sent to us from our manager at 5 minutes to 8am. Long, but the main point was we must all wear masks every day all day, starting that day.   There was more detail about what it  had to look like, and the additional fact of needing to self-report taking our own temperatures daily, etc, but after we all got upset and cursed up a storm and freaked out and panicked and  had our tantrums...then we all put them on.  

They are so uncomfortable. You feel like you are smothering. It's difficult to breathe. You sound muffled, both in person and on the phone. Your glasses fog up. Your ears hurt. You have to lift it up and hold it up, when you need a drink of water, off and on all damn day.  It's a big ol pain in the butt.  We all really resent it.

First pt that morning didn't show up.  When LadyDoc came in she looked at us all working away silently at our computers, wearing masks and , she said, "Ok, what's going on?"  CoworkerRN  handed her a printout of the email, and I said resignedly, "We all have to wear masks now. All day."

LadyDoc raised her eyebrows, and said "That's bull... "  although she didn't use that word.   She read the email and immediately began bashing it. Out loud to us. She is getting more and more frustrated with the virus process, and the way things are being handled. Remember she is a 45-supporter, and believes this whole thing is over-rated, that it will all be over in a few months.  Now, no matter how looney she is about this, for once I loved hearing how upset she was, because we all felt the same way.

Anyway, that's how the day went.  Adjusting to the reality of patients and people wearing masks. How do we take temps with people wearing masks, and how do we manage phone calls, and other issues. LadyDoc decreed we don't need to wear the masks if there are no patients in the office, thank God. That happens enough that the actual amount of time wearing them is bearable. 

But shortly afterwards that same day, a patient came by with gifts. He is a woodworker, and was so grateful for the help he had received in managing his pain, that he made us all our names in wood. 

  We were all so touched. The letters are all connected. It looks really cool. 

I had brought CoWorkerCMA a few cuttings of a plant I don't know the name of. I have lots of it, the same way I have had lots of the shrimp plants, but the difference is that this grows on the ground. It's like a spider plant but it throws its runners out along the ground. So I brought her some; it was all wrapped up in wet paper towels, and J asked what I was doing. I explained calmly that I'd promised I'd bring some more shrimp plants but since I don't have any of those anymore I was bringing her this. J hung his head and didn't say anything else. 

Later he texted me he had asked John, Louise's son if he could  take a few cuttings from their shrimp plants, and of course was granted permission. So he put those in a pot with soil, and got those packaged up for me to take to work the next day. That was so sweet of him.

He had a regular cardio appt that day which went well, and needs to do the Holter monitor test again, so that's arranged for this week.  They are going to wean him off the amiodarone, which is a good thing.  He's lost more weight, and is down to 191. Both the cardiologist and his PCP are very proud of him. 

I'm  concerned since we still have no results from the CT, despite him having called the office twice now. Guess if it were bad they would have called.

Tuesday  I found that "The Treasure of Sierra Madre" was on TCM. This happens to be a movie J had dearly wanted to see, having not seen it in years. We had recently found it on Netflix and Prime, but as a rental, which both of us balked at.  

However I just happened to check TCM that evening, and there it was. I re-wound it as it had already started, and we sat and thoroughly enjoyed it. I'd never seen it before, another Bogart film I had heard about but never happened to catch.  So good.

Wednesday morning the tile guy came: Keith.  I wasn't allowed to see any of the  work in progress, which was okay with me. It was exciting throughout the day just imagining what it would look like. When I got home, J insisted I close my eyes and he led me in so that I could see it with the kitchen cleaned up and the backsplash all done. I opened my eyes and wanted to cry at how beautiful it looked...  

My lord, am I glad we did this professionally!  I know it was more expensive to have to rip it all down, and replace the drywall, and buy more tile, and then have to pay someone, but OMG it was all worth it. 

And actually it only cost $200 for the tile guy, and since we had bought too much  in replacement supplies from Home Depot, we got $96 back when it was all returned. 

As of this morning, J has installed under cabinet lighting, so here's that photo:

The only awkward thing is that a neighbor who has helped J in the past (who had also offered to help J with this tiling job, insisting he was a master craftsman) happened to stop by during the tile work that day. Oh dear.

Naturally he was surprised to find someone else doing the job. J had to explain. Which he did in a brief conversation that day, and then in a longer text: it explained that I was the Queen of the house (and James knows this, having had this same conversation with J numerous times in the past--you know--men joking with each other), and that I'd insisted on this professional because he was recommended by my co-worker. Most of this was sort of true.   But James so far has not responded to J's reaching out, and so he is sad and worried that he may have inadvertently damaged this friendship.

Personally I don't really care for James, but I hate for J to have any awkwardness in his dealings with his friends, especially since he lives just  a few doors down. We have to pass his house in leaving the neighborhood, or coming back in. Normally we wave and smile, or stop by to toss some BS back and forth. That's not happening now, because James is suddenly never outside.

Thursday the Nurse's Day celebrations began. We all got balloons and gift bags,  and Friday morning breakfast was provided.   So nice of them to make a big deal of this.  

Friday was an insane  morning at work, as usual,  but I had only one new patient. He was an absolute dream patient: organized in his history,  thoughtful, funny, smart, challenging but not hopeless, and with a great attitude. We clicked right away.  My doc loved him too, and that was a great way to start the day. 

The next 6 patients were all crazy, and we had issues with each one. Typical Friday. It was payday, though, and that helps. Also, my doc's wife had made flan, which was waiting in the kitchen for us. Someone had brought cookies, too. 

I had weighed in for  WW and found I'd gained a pound, no surprise since I knew it had been a difficult week.  I was relieved it wasn't more. But by Friday I'd managed to re-set my brain and my attitude, and I am back on track. 

I do have my little challenges: 1) We can't find our favorite butter substitute anywhere except in the tiny 3 oz containers. Stupidly expensive that way. A minor irritation, but there it is.
2) A person had come to give J an estimate on whether we have an irrigation system or not,  and unexpectedly charged him $75 for this call, which we hadn't  known about; when J gave him a check the guy tried to tell him to make it out to him instead of the company. So J made it out to both of them. That was 5 weeks ago and the check hasn't cleared.  
3) The dogs desperately need their toenails clipped, and I'm too scared to do it.  
4)  J wants to have multiple various screen repairs made to the enclosure, and that will include having the three screen doors remade with solid bottoms so the dogs don't continually scratch  the screen out of place; this will be $300. I'm wondering if we should wait until after Hurricane season. 
5)  I really, really want a haircut, but this continues to be the one thing--besides the wearing of masks--that J and I kerfuffle about. We had a heated discussion, yesterday, after my AlAnon meeting, thank God. It left a nasty taste in my mouth, since these heated discussions almost never happen.  It really shakes me.  However we agreed to disagree finally, and got on with the planned errands for the day. It took most of the day for that lingering uneasiness to leave. And I still don't know what to do about my hair.

But last night we had a great dinner, and treated ourselves to an actual movie rental on Prime, with Daniel Craig.   "Knives Out", which I'd wanted to see in the movie theater last fall, and never gotten the chance to. It was awesome. Very cleverly written.

And my big treat for the week was some books. My dad had given me one or two in the series each year on my birthday and for Christmas, growing up, and eventually I had almost the whole collection. I treasured them, reading them over and over.  Hurricane Hugo destroyed them all, except for one. (I lost a lot of my books in that hurricane.) So this year when two co-workers gave me Amazon gift cards, I bought the replacements. 

These are not single books, because individually they are mind-bogglingly expensive to replace; who knew they would be collector's items?  But this is the whole set in a boxed collection, with the original drawings by the author. So I can overlook the fantastical artwork on the books' covers, and  re-read my beloved Dr Dolittle adventures. I'm so, so thrilled to have these, after so many years. 

Today is Mother's Day, and MissS will come over later. J will make a chicken pot pie, one of my favorites. It's not really warm enough to use the pool but it might get warmer.

 I think today is the season finale of Outlander, so we'll be watching that. Can't believe it's the finale already-- feels like it just started.

This week we have a potluck on Thursday for LadyDoc's birthday.  And I think  J has another appt this week. 

What else will happen? Who knows. 

But I'm grateful...TYG

 

Sunday

Listening to the radio. Sunday mornings I try to listen to a show broadcast from the Keys called "Acoustic Guitar".  When that's over I switch to  a local broadcast called "American Top 40 with Casey Kasem";  of course Casey died years ago, but they are re-broadcasting the shows in order, calling them "Classic AT 40". Today's show is from May 5, 1973.  At this moment Elvis is singing a blues song called "Steam Roller Blues", something I've never heard.  Wonderful;  the show's music  brings back a lot of memories.

These songs from the late-60s and 70s, I consider my radio years, what I grew up listening to, my formative years.  After that, from the 80s on, I listened mainly to records by certain artists, or radio stations in certain categories, not the "top 40" stations anymore. It's my mood setter, my mood changer.

Especially important today because I'm still feeling upset from yesterday's shock.  I had a perfectly normal morning in my Zoom AlAnon meeting at first. I had to leave the meeting a few minutes early because Bro and SIL arrived bearing gifts of extra TP,   and then we stood outside and talked and got caught up. It was quite hot and sunny, an absolutely gorgeous Florida day. 

It was great to see them-- Bro's hair is longer, and SILs hair is showing grey at the roots. We all laughed at how much we miss our hair stylists, but we just have to deal with it a little while longer. Like everyone else, I desperately need a cut, but my shop is still closed.  

Then J and I went to Walmart for a few items including bird seed, antihistamines, shampoo, light bulbs, wine.  What a list.  We got home, unloaded from the car,  J sprayed everything down, we dried it off and put it all away. J was somewhat tired but I still had energy so we went outside to clean up the back yard. 

He had briefly and cryptically texted me at work Wednesday that he was enlarging the garden area in preparation for  doubling his growing capacity. He had also tossed everything around, tools and hoses and screens, and it was all scattered and disorganized. I couldn't stand seeing it from the doorway and had been itching to get out there and put it all away.

So I walk out and look at the cleared garden area. I notice it looks ...different. It's right in front of the fence between Louise's back yard and ours. I notice I can almost see right through to Louise's yard. It hit me then: the shrimp plants are all gone.  I want to cry just remembering my shock at this.  

The shrimp plants were about 6 feet tall, in a patch about 8 feet long, and almost two feet in depth from our shared fence.  They were beautiful; the hummingbirds loved them, they were one of the best parts of my side yard. I was so proud of them.  Now, they are gone. 

I stood there staring. Disbelieving what was in front of me.  Nothing there but piles of brush from the side of the shed (the ginger! He cut down all the ginger, too!) and the shrimp plants, tossed in piles around the yard.  I started crying. Right there, unable to take my eyes off that space. J came back from dragging a load to the front curb and saw me, and I said "What happened to my shrimp plants??"  He said defensively, "I texted you about this, I told you I got a little out of hand. I'm sorry!  I was clearing this out and the weed eater blade was wider than I thought and it all went. I'm sorry..." 

Well.   This "conversation" went on. I couldn't even look at him, I was so upset. I could not stop crying as I started picking up the shreds and dead branches of everything that he'd cut. He followed me and kept trying to explain, apologizing over and over, useless as that was.  Too late to do  that.   

(I've re-read the text where he said he'd told me about it. The text reads:  "Cleaned up a bit in the yard and cut back further than I thought, no worries though, one can watch stuff grow here in FL and no one will be moving in Louise's  for awhile."    This does not begin to explain my beloved shrimp plants being decimated. I was not even a little bit prepared. )

I was, and remain,  in shock even now.  J couldn't understand why I didn't just get over it.  Every time I looked over there I started up all over again with the tears, but I couldn't help it. It just broke my heart.  I was grieving.

In his desperation to make things right, he got the idea to plant the rubber tree there , which will grow fast and fill in some of that bare space. The tree was in a whisky barrel on the other side of the yard, because originally we were going to put it in the bare space to the new neighbor's yard. J was in such haste and need to make it all better that he had to plant this. Right then. So he dragged it through the enclosure in the barrel and all the way to the  back where it was planted eventually, after he dug an enormous hole for it.  

By this time it was about 4 pm. I'd given up working outside after 2 hours, just exhausted from all the weeding, and picking up, and carrying loads to the front; I had taken some ibuprofen, and was trying to stretch my back out.  We both got in the pool, and just soaked. Back inside we just sat for awhile, cooling off.

Eventually we recovered enough to think about dinner: a wonderfully yummy deli chicken, and rice, and Brussel sprouts, with cookies for dessert. Then we watched a great John Cusack movie we hadn't seen before. Perfect evening.

This week he has also chiseled off all the backsplash. Since that took off some of the drywall, he has a new piece ready to go on. Meanwhile a co-worker gave me the name of some tilers she knows, and one of them is coming this week. I think he is thrilled to have a professional take over, once the new drywall is up.

He also was approved for the Pradaxa for another year, thankfully. A shipment is on its way. We are so relieved.   He has an appt with his cardiologist this week.

He saw his primary care doc and had a chest x-ray, which showed "inflammation". This warranted a CT scan, which was done Friday. We'll know results tomorrow or Tuesday. Not too concerned...but there's that little bit of...hmm, what is that??

And in another accident this week, the microwave slid off the garbage can where J had perched it briefly, crashing to the floor and shattering the glass door. This all happened first thing in the morning before I was even awake. Somehow I slept through the whole thing.

J had the kitchen cleaned up and dead microwave out in the trash before I woke up and showered and came out ready for work, wondering where the microwave was.   So we went microwave shopping after work. Fortunately I'd had a slow day at work and was able to do research; we found a highly-rated one for less than $100 at Target.

Work was  okay this week: one absolutely crazy patient, but other than that, not too bad. On Thursday I think it was, we got the OK from the higher-ups to resume doing elective procedures, and to see pts in office if they want. However most people are happy to continue with Telehealth visits, partly because it doesn't cost them anything!   Friday we had 7 patients, but only two in the office. 

Thursday  I stopped at a store on the way home, and got home shortly after 5:15, changing clothes and sitting down with J to talk about the day. Suddenly I noticed my phone was lighting up--my daughter was calling. Now, she never calls me. I panicked. Tried answering but too late. Tried calling her, line was busy.  Tried texting, saw she'd sent me a text asking if I were going to the meeting.  I was puzzled, thinking, what meeting??

Turns out Sis had sent an email that morning inviting us sibs to a Zoom meeting with my dad and Carol!   At 5:30. Well, J and I leapt into action logging onto the computer, finding the Zoom app, then the meeting number, and suddenly there everyone was! (Well, almost everyone--Bro and SIL had a prior appt.) It was so cool. 

The only problem was we couldn't see Dad!  Apparently he could see us, but couldn't hear us. Still, for our first try at a family Zoom meeting--with wine!-- it went so well we all  talked and laughed until 7 pm. It was such a great idea; I give all credit to my sister for figuring this out, hosting, and getting Dad involved. I'm sure once Bro is up in Vermont actually sitting with Dad next weekend  to do this, it will work out. 

So overall it was a good week except for my poor shrimp plants... I'm    just so sad over those. In a few months I will look back and know whether I "over-reacted", depending on whether they have started to grow back.   But right now it just overwhelms me. I'm grateful MissS is coming over this afternoon. I know she will understand, and not pressure me to move on. 

Can't remember if I've mentioned that Sophie's blindness is worsening. I know there is nothing to do about it, so we are learning how to live with a blind dog. We think she can see shades of light and dark, but those shades are lessening. We notice it mostly when she needs to go out at night: we have to sometimes pick her up and carry her to the door, because she is too afraid to walk if she can't see across the deck to the door. Poor little thing. But she is so sweet, and so loving, and so much a part of the family. Memorial Day weekend will be the one year anniversary of her coming to live with us. I don't regret it at all, even though it certainly didn't work out the way we thought it would! 

TYG for my life.